What is rural Alabama coming to?

By: Ronald Brantley

 

While on my recent trip to the hospital they took 31 pounds of fluid from my body and to keep it from returning they put me on a medicine called sildenafil, also known as Viagra.

Did you know Viagra was developed for the treatment of pulmonary hypertension — high blood pressure of the lungs? Then they found the drug had other qualities and probably made a billion dollars. The only side effects I have had is I dreamed of Dolly Parton one night.

I told James Bush that I had a new dog and I named him Three Miles. Now when my doctor asks if I am exercising, I tell him that I walked Three Miles yesterday and Three Miles today. The doctor seemed satisfied. James didn’t laugh; it seems he doesn’t know a good joke. That is why he always has a corny one to tell.

Back in the early 1960s, Coca-Cola expanded and put out a king-size Coke. Inside the bottle cap of these king-size Cokes was a picture of a big all-star football player such as Bart Starr, Y.A. Tittle, Johnny Unitas and many more. They had gimmicks to go along with the bottle caps. If you sent in so many from one team, they would send you a prize and so on. This customer brought me about 1,000 caps he had collected as a boy. If any of you readers know more about these bottle caps, let me know. After I went to the hospital sometime back, I got to thinking about tombstones. What should I have put on my tombstone? What if I put, “He stopped loving her today?” How many women would think I was talking about them? Then I decided I would think of something else.

I got to thinking about my new great-grand boy and stick horses. Let me tell you something real sad. I was talking about stick horses and chinaberry trees the other day and one kid asked, “What is a chinaberry tree?” Oh, this hurt. I liked to have broke down and cried. A chinaberry tree is one of the most essential ingredients in growing up. You climb a chinaberry tree, make stick horses out of them, make pop guns and use chinaberries for ammunition. When chinaberries get overripe they make good bird food. They are easy to cut down so boys can make swords out of the limbs. Chinaberry trees are a must in developing a young boy’s growing-up days. I personally don’t see how any young boy can develop into a young man without chinaberry trees. To me they are just as important as air and water. Young boys have already lost Saturday afternoon Westerns at the theater, vine swinging, tadpole collecting and now they, “What is a chinaberry tree?” I ask what is rural Alabama coming to? Wake up parents; we are losing our young boys. Stop by and I will show you some great bottle caps.